I knew at some point I would feel ready to share about my first year postpartum, and I think the time has finally come. It’s honestly such a long story and I’ve put it off for so long because it’s felt overwhelming to even think about where to start. And I also thought, does anyone really even care? I mean sure people care, but is putting my health on blast for the world to see positively benefiting anyone? Last month, I finally learned my Enneagram number. I’m a 2, which is referred to as “the helper.” As I’ve thought about this more and more, it’s become clear to me why I have this blog and corresponding Instagram account in the first place. I genuinely want to help people with their health and wellbeing. 

Between diet culture (eat less + exercise more = lose weight), our society’s obsession with being small, weight loss propaganda that targets our deepest insecurities and what we are fed through mainstream media, the average person is SO misinformed about what “health” actually means and how to achieve it. This isn’t information we are taught in school, and it’s not information we’re likely to receive in a fifteen minute doctor’s appointment once a year. So with constant messaging that says one thing, and a lack of education about our bodies that would serve as a great defense against said messaging, we find ourselves in this impossible position of “doing all the right things” (so we think) to better our health (or should I say lose weight, because that’s all most people think getting healthy means), but it’s not working. 

I feel extremely lucky that by some chance, I stumbled upon the right bits and pieces of information at the right times to come to the realization that my definition of health was incredibly inaccurate. Knowing that not everyone enjoys learning about the body as a hobby and may not have the information I’ve acquired over the past few years, and knowing that lots and LOTS of people are struggling with some aspect of their health, I truly just can’t keep this stuff to myself. I feel called to share what I’ve learned through my experiences because even if just one person approaches their health differently because of it, I will consider it well worth my time. Nope, I’m definitely not a doctor. But I don’t think I need to be to make a positive impact on those around me in the name of health. So I’ll continue to show up here and share my story when it feels like the thing to do. 

I remember going to my two week postpartum check up and reading the scale that said I was down 13 pounds from what I weighed when I gave birth. Sweet. 17 pounds is all I have left? That will take care of itself in no time if I just continue to feed my body with nutrient dense foods and move my body when I can (once I’m healed and ready). And truly, I was so focused on adjusting to life with a newborn and just trying to remember to eat (yes, that’s literally a problem moms with newborns face), that I wasn’t even thinking about what the scale might say if I stepped on it. I didn’t. Because until I started going to my prenatal appointments, I didn’t regularly weigh myself for almost a year. 

So I just went on about my way without much worry as to what my weight was. Then to my surprise when I returned for my six week check up, I had gained almost all of those 13 pounds back. WTF? Isn’t that number supposed to be going DOWN, not up? I shrugged it off as just some “fluctuations” and attributed it to my changing hormones and maybe eating a little too much processed junk (because it was quick and easy) in the early days of motherhood. But in addition to the weight, I also started to notice some other not so fun symptoms including: 

Extreme fatigue (even after a full night’s rest)

Severe bloating after eating certain foods (usually gluten, grains or sugar)

Gas

Belching

Skin rashes

Insomnia

Joint pain 

Hot flashes 

Hair loss

Migraines

Add those symptoms on top of interrupted sleep throughout the night and to put it frankly, I felt like complete shit. I was living on cold brew and naps, and knew that something wasn’t right. (I also couldn’t imagine if I hadn’t had the privilege of 12 weeks paid maternity leave. How in the world would I have managed feeling this way and needing to work at the same time? I can’t help but wonder about how many women are truly suffering behind a smile when they return to work much earlier than I had to.) My body was SCREAMING for me to listen to it. But do you know how easy it could have been to dismiss those cries for help and chalk it up to being a “new mom?” Too easy, because that’s exactly what I did for four months. Sadly, so many of us are very out of touch with our bodies because we are too busy (working, running around, doing beyond what is humanly possible every day) to listen. And we learn to stop listening because society tells us to value things that go against our naturally intuitive nature and that a positive attitude and strong work ethic are all you need to do anything. When you feel tired, your body is telling you it’s time to rest. Ever felt tired and had something like this run through your mind? “I’m not tired, I don’t have time to rest. I’ll sleep when I’m dead. Bring me some coffee!” Additionally, even if we DO listen to our bodies and end up telling a doctor about it, we are often dismissed and sometimes even told that what we’re experiencing is “normal.” Once I finally started listening to my body, I knew that what it was telling me was far from normal for me and that this was unlike anything I had experienced before.

Below is a rough timeline of doctor’s appointments and labs. I include this just to emphasize that true healing isn’t instantaneous (unfortunately) or linear. As I experienced, there will likely be detours, twists and turns and dead ends. 

November 2019 – I was experiencing symptoms listed above. My thyroid was tested by my midwife all levels came back within normal ranges. Fun fact: there are EIGHT levels associated with thyroid health that should be tested, but standard labs (which is what this was) only test three of those eight levels and often leaves much of the true story of what’s going on untold. 

January 2020 – Still experiencing symptoms, I did another standard thyroid test with my midwife. Levels came back within normal ranges again. 

February – I decided to eat an anti-inflammatory diet to get some symptom relief. I removed gluten, grains, dairy, legumes, sugar and alcohol. I had done this before when I completed a Whole 30 which taught me the profound impact that food has on how we feel from day to day. Within just FIVE days I felt a huge difference. This was a clue to me that inflammation was driving a lot of my symptoms.

March – I sought out a Functional Medicine Practitioner to do an overall evaluation. In functional medicine, the body’s systems are viewed as being very interconnected and FMPs strive to find the root cause of the problem rather than alleviate symptoms of the problem with prescriptions.

April – I had my first appointment with the Functional Medicine Practitioner and Dietician who work together to support patient health. They did a very thorough overview of my health history and current symptoms I was experiencing. They did a FULL thyroid panel, a hormone panel, gut impermeability (“leaky gut”) test, and took labs that measured vitamin and mineral levels. My labs revealed that I did have intestinal permeability and I was deficient in Vitamin D, B12, and iron. The FMP said there was nothing that required much intervention on his part and that working with the Dietician would be the most helpful thing for me to do. I started on some supplements that at least had me feeling less fatigued and getting better sleep at night, so things were at least trending in the right direction. I continued to have gas, belching, bloating and weight gain. 

May – I experimented with eating different foods with periods of eating an anti-inflammatory diet and periods of including inflammatory foods. I had extreme symptom flare ups (bloating, belching, gas, weight gain, rashes, joint pain) when including inflammatory foods. I decided to keep them out of my diet to get symptom relief. 

September – I had a follow up appointment with the FMP and Dietician and shared that despite taking gut healing supplements, I was still experiencing symptoms. As bloating, belching and gas are hallmark signs for SIBO (small intestine bacterial overgrowth) they had me do a breath test, which came back positive. 

October – I started on two different antibiotics, one that I took for two weeks and one that I took for four weeks. Once I finished those, I moved onto antimicrobial drops that I took with every meal. SIBO is very hard to completely eradicate and from what I had read, this was a moderate to aggressive treatment plan for it, which I was in favor of. 

December – Follow up with FMP and Dietician. Bloating, belching and gas had gone away indicating that we had successfully eradicated the SIBO – yay! However there is a very high chance of relapse (especially when it’s really difficult to determine the underlying cause of SIBO). 

I also told the dietician that I noticed a concerning trend. Any time I had inflammatory foods present in my diet (gluten, grains, dairy, sugar) whether on occasion or consistently in moderation, I gained weight. When I cut them out I would lose a couple of pounds (if anything) and then that weight became my new baseline that I could maintain while keeping those foods eliminated. But if I reintroduced them, I would continue to gain weight and the vicious cycle would continue. She said that is definitely concerning and is a sign that my body is holding on to excess weight for a reason we haven’t resolved yet. 

Present: I’m ECSTATIC to report that after a month of an anti-inflammatory diet, prebiotics, probiotics and some additional gut supplements, it seems like we have stopped the never ending weight gain and some of the additional symptoms I was continuing to see: rashes, migraines, joint pain, swelling and fatigue. We plan to complete some additional labs prior to my next appointment (most likely a GI Map test) to further tailor my supplements to restore the microbial balance in my gut.

It’s been so refreshing to have someone validate that there is a reason my body is holding onto extra weight that doesn’t include telling me I’m eating too much and not exercising enough. While that’s a really simple way to explain why people are overweight (and what the dieting industry wants you to believe so you will buy their products) it’s simply not true. If you are gaining weight or are overweight, there is an underlying cause such as: a hormone imbalance, blood sugar imbalance, or an unhealthy gut just to name a few. And once those causes are resolved, then the weight will take care of itself. But the issue is we’re told to target the weight, not our health. Furthermore, health looks different on everyone. Some bodies are naturally bigger than others and that doesn’t necessarily mean that person’s body is unhealthy. 

If someone would have told me the smallest my body would be for the next year was on the day I gave birth, I think I would have seriously had a mental breakdown. By far the hardest part of my pregnancy was coping with the extreme physical changes happening to my body at a very rapid pace. (And I realize I’m really privileged to say that was the hardest part.) You can’t quite comprehend how much that impacts the way you see yourself until you experience it. By the end, I was SO ready to get back to feeling like myself physically. Little did I know that each passing day was just going to take me further and further away from the familiar version of my body I so desperately wanted to reunite with again. Although this has been an incredibly hard reality, I’ve gained so much more than just weight. 

I’ve gained a new perspective on how I value myself.

As much as I hate to admit it, I had somehow started to believe that I needed to look a certain way (by dieting and exercising) to feel like I was of value to myself. Through therapy and lots of self reflection, I realized I was finding value and self worth in my appearance prior to my pregnancy. I was able to uncover the negative beliefs I had about myself and why I felt the need to prove myself in this way. It’s been incredibly hard to work through all of those thoughts and to truly believe that my self worth has nothing to do with what I look like, but I’ve made a lot of progress over the past year.

I’ve gained the ability to find happiness and joy in the midst of the challenges with my health.

I’ve gained so much love for who I am and what I can offer to the world.

I’ve gained a sincere appreciation for how incredibly complex my body is, and it’s ability to heal when given the right tools.

I’ve gained a renewed sense of empathy towards others. Many people didn’t know this was a hardship I was experiencing, and I know that I encounter people on a daily basis whose struggles aren’t known to me. I’m more kind and willing to give grace than I was before.

I’ve also gained sympathy for those who are struggling with their health specifically. For the people that wake up each day feeling uncomfortable, feeling stuck, helpless, lost, confused, and just wanting answers. I see you.

And I know that it took gaining weight for all of this to happen. There are definitely days I don’t love that this is my path. But I continue to trust that God has sent me down this path for a reason. And I believe that part of my reason is to share my story as a way to connect with others and empower them on their journey to health and healing. If you want assitance with finding resources, are curious about any other parts of my journey or just want someone to listen to your story, please reach out to me.

With love,

Lauren

Do you ever sit down to watch TV and you can’t? Like your internet is out for some random reason, the streaming is bad, the next episode of your show isn’t up, etc. That’s happening to me right now. And usually when this happens, I take it as a sign from the universe that I should be doing something better with my time than crying over This Is Us. So here I am, attempting to write so many of the thoughts that have been swimming in my head for, honestly, about the past year. And oh how I wish my laptop wasn’t on the fritz right about now so that I wasn’t typing this in the notes app on my phone. But when the urge to write is there I try to follow it regardless of the circumstances, including technological difficulties.

Once I found out I was pregnant last January, one of the first things I wondered (and worried) about, was how this whole experience would change my body. If you haven’t followed me or know the history of my health, in a nutshell I was slightly “overweight” we’ll call it, for most of my life and once I got old enough to become the victim of marketing that preyed on my insecurities I tried just about everything to lose weight. When none of that worked, I focused on getting healthy, and what do you know, as a result the weight my body didn’t need disappeared. When I found out I was pregnant, I was about at the peak of my journey to better health and I was really proud of the body that had come with it. I looked fit, was the smallest size I had ever been as an adult and I had some guns! It took a long time for me to start looking pregnant. Finally by around 23 weeks, it was obvious. And that’s when the comments about my body started rolling in.

*Now let me preface this next part. If you said any of the following phrases to me while I was pregnant, I wasn’t offended, I’m not upset with you, and I know your intentions were good. No need to apologize.

You see, throughout my pregnancy I tried to maintain my healthy lifestyle. I tried to eat lots of nutrient dense food and do workouts that were safe for both me and baby. I think a lot of people assumed that’s why I looked small. After being terrified of gaining weight in the past, I wasn’t all that thrilled with that inevitable part of growing a human inside me. And I’d be lying if I didn’t say part of me was continuing to eat well and workout so I wouldn’t gain as much weight as I might if I didn’t do those things. (But most of me was continuing to do those things because they make me feel good, pregnant or not.) Anyways. So when I heard comments like:

“Oh my gosh, I look more pregnant than you after that lunch I just ate!”

“Wow You can’t even tell you’re pregnant from behind.

“You’re all baby.”

It felt good. But at the same time I started noticing a theme behind all of these statements. For one, so many of the comments or statements that were intended as compliments, were all in regards to what I looked like physically. And two, the undertone was what we’ve all been taught to believe: being small is good and being big is bad. (And that the smaller you are, the healthier you are.)

So yeah, I enjoyed those comments at first. But the more I heard them, the more I realized how obsessed our society is with physical appearance. (I’m not excluding myself here either.) And it really started to bother me. Because what if I didn’t look this way? And what about other people who don’t look this way? What comments do they hear?

Oh, I know. Because I got some of those comments too. (And am also guilty of saying them to other women in the past.)

“Dang girl, you got even bigger over the weekend!”

“Is your due date tomorrow?” (Seriously, from a stranger in Hobby Lobby.)

“Eight more weeks? You look like you’re ready to pop any day!”

Sometimes I’d get comments about being small AND being big in the same day. This made me realize that everyone’s opinions are so relative to their own personal experiences. Because if I was smaller than they were (or their sister, friend, neighbor, other woman they know of, was) at that given point in my pregnancy, to them I was small, with the opposite being true if I was bigger.

Overall I gained 30 pounds. And the ONLY reason I’m even mentioning this number is because I think it’s important to acknowledge that I still gained weight despite how small anyone thought I was, and despite eating pretty healthy and working out because that’s what your body does when you’re pregnant. Truthfully I felt like I had pretty little control over what shape my body took on. And unless someone throws all caution to the wind and eats everything in sight just simply “because they’re pregnant,” I’d imagine that most women don’t have much to do with the shape they take on while they’re pregnant either. 30 pounds was a healthy pregnancy for me, while it could have ended up being an unhealthy pregnancy for someone else. And the same goes for 15 pounds and even 60 pounds. That number says so little out of context.

After I had the baby, I kind of thought the weight I had gained would just disappear because nearly half of it did immediately following birth. And because I had continued my healthy habits up until the last few weeks of my pregnancy. But to my surprise, when I went back for my six week check up, I had gained back most of that and currently weigh almost as much as I did the day I gave birth.

And what I hear now?

“Girl, you don’t even look like you just had a baby!”

And I awkwardly say thanks and just try to change the subject because I know it’s intended as a compliment. But it’s unintetionally implying that it’s bad if I do look like I just had a baby. And I DO look like I just had a baby underneath my clothes. And that’s okay. Actually, it’s more than okay. And the fact that any of us have ever been made to believe that it’s not, or that trying to reverse the changes to our bodies should be our priority (ever, but especially) immediately following birth is such a shame.

This has not been effortless for me to believe. In fact there have been some tears over it. Which is why I took time to write this. Because no new mom (or ANY person for that matter) needs to waste even a second feeling like this. There are SO many things that are more worthy of our attention during this season of life (like spending all the time we can enjoying the new life we brought into the world and resting and healing from the intense physical event, and nine months, our bodies just went through). But in order for us to remember that, we’ve ALL got to change the way we talk about our own size, or someone else’s size. Regardless of whether they are pregnant, postpartum, or neither. So what DO we say about it?

Nothing.

Because size is not indicative of health. Small does not always mean healthy. Big does not always mean unhealthy. What’s small to you may be big to someone else, and vice versa. A big baby bump on one person might be healthier than a small baby bump on another person. A person who looks like they “never had a baby” may be doing really unhealthy things to appear that way, and a person who is taking time to heal themselves and focus on other things besides their appearance may look unhealthy.

And regardless of what size someone is, and how healthy or unhealthy they are, neither of those things has anything to do with their worth. Neither of those things have anything to do with YOUR worth. You are not more worthy of happiness, success or love if you have a six pack, eat fruits and vegetables at every meal and wear a size small. I didn’t have a six pack, but those other two things are true of another point in my life. And guess what? I wasn’t any more deserving of happiness, success or love than I am right now with my tummy rolling over the top of my jeans.

In the past I read stuff like I’m writing now and I really couldn’t buy into it. My mentality just wasn’t there, yet. And if you can’t buy into this now either, that’s okay. Just know that it’s true whether you feel like it is or not. Something that helped me overcome this was noticing things about myself that had nothing to do with how I looked.

“Wow, I really knocked that presentation out of the park today!”

“I was a really good listener when my friend needed me.”

“I’m proud of myself.”

Because once I stopped being so laser focused on my own personal appearance, I stopped paying attention to, caring about and commenting on anyone else’s.

“You handled that situation so well today even though I’m sure it was really challenging.”

“I thought your idea about how to ____ was brilliant!”

“I really enjoy working with you. You have such a positive attitude and it always brightens my day.”

Moving the needle on all of this stuff starts with us. It starts with you, and it starts with me. So I’ll just be over here reminding myself of all of this every day. Because I need to hear it every day. And if you do too, here’s your reminder for today. Maybe you can be the one to remind yourself tomorrow, and every day after that.

I’m currently on day 17 of my second round of the Whole30! It’s been fun to compare what my experience was like the first time around to now. I’m so glad I decided to do it again because it’s shown me how much I have learned and made progress on in the year in between.  More to come later on that.  After my first round, I kept a lot of the compliant meals in my regular rotation and had still been using them up until the time I started my second round. Things like eating broccoli for breakfast, tomato basil soup with meatballs and orange chicken have continued to be staples for me. But, that also meant that my go-to meals quickly started to get old pretty quick during this round because the excitement of trying something new was no longer a part of the equation. 

Now, I certainly didn’t make thirty new dinners or lunches this round, but I did recreate a few dishes, like the one I’m sharing here in addition to trying some brand new recipes. Not trying to pat myself on the back here, but I also realized how much of a better cook I am now than I was last year at this time. Not just knowing recipes off the top of my head, but knowing how to make them (the right order and timing of individual steps that will yield the most perfect end result), knowing exactly what seasonings to use for the flavor I’m looking to taste, etc. has made all the difference in the food I’ve been eating this round. I’m so glad I’ve grown to love preparing good food that’s also good for me. I didn’t wake up one day knowing how to do all of this and I know I have much more to learn, but I’m happy with the noteable progress I’ve made! 

Last round there were two dishes I particularly enjoyed for some carbs at breakfast time: pumpkin bake and mashed sweet potatoes with pecans and ghee (clarified butter) on top. Both are served warm, but taste almost as delicious cold, straight from the fridge.  And they both have this comforting sensation that only comes with food you prepare during the colder months. The sweet and savory combination of flavors that come with fall seasonings and the creamy stick to your ribs feeling you get after eating your mom’s mashed potatoes. So needless to say when I went to prepare one of these dishes at the start of this round, I had a hard time deciding which one to make, because they’re both SO good. So I decided to combine my favorite parts of the two. 

I knew I for sure wanted to include the pecans and ghee topping that I used for the mashed sweet potatoes, and I also wanted to include the pumpkin and the cinnamony goodness of the pumpkin bake. Traditionally, I know it’s common to boil potatoes prior to mashing them. But it’s so easy to peel a few potatoes and pop them in the oven while I’m doing other things around the house so that’s turned into my favorite method of getting potatoes soft enough to mash. 

I peeled three sweet potatoes, wrapped them in foil and baked them at 450 for a little over an hour.  Once they had cooled enough to touch, I put them in a large mixing bowl with 1 can of pumpkin puree and mixed the two together. I then continued to add almond milk until they were silky smooth and creamy, but not runny. Somewhere between 1/2 and 1 cup. I added 1 tsp of cinnamon, 1/4 tsp of nutmeg a couple twists of sea salt. 

In the food processor I combined roughly 1 cup of pecans and ground them to my preferred size. I melted 4 T of ghee in a small bowl, added the pecans and tossed them with a couple twists of sea salt. I oiled a large glass baking dish, added the sweet potato and pumpkin mixture and spread it out. Finally, I used a spoon to sprinkle on the pecan and ghee topping. I baked this dish at 350 for roughly 30 minutes, until the pecans started to brown on top.

I ate this for a whole week of breakfasts, and alongside some lunches and dinners as a quick go to carb option. It lasted for-ev-er and I loved every delicous bite of it!

Now the next time someone asks if you prefer pumpkin or sweet potato, tell them thanks to this recipe, you no longer have to choose! Let me know if you make this and love it by commenting or tagging me on Instagram @wellwithlb.

Happy cooking!

Lauren

I started a blog post around Thanksgiving that started to go in a different direction by the middle of December, and now that it’s January 1 I’m being pulled in a completely different direction and I think it’s what needs shared today. I’ll get back to the other stuff later – it’s good.

Today, I’ve already seen so many posts about new year’s resolutions regarding weight loss and the words being used are sending me straight back to how I felt about myself on this very day two years ago. And my mentality around all of this could not be more different now than compared to what it was back then. Here’s what I wish I would have known at the beginning of 2017. I’ll be completely honest and tell you that if I were to have read this blog post two years ago, these concepts would have felt completely foreign to me and I probably would have disagreed with most of them. It’s taken some pretty constant effort to rewire the thoughts I previously had about my health, my worth, my body and my happiness. But this rewiring has also allowed me to love myself so much more than I ever knew I could.

My size is not necessarily indicative of my health. Our society focuses SO much on “weight loss” and the negative impact that being overweight can have on one’s body. While I do believe that’s true (to some extent), I also think it’s true that there are a thousand ways to lose weight that are not in the pursuit of good health. “Smaller” is not always equal to “healthier.” Example: in 2014 I lost weight by eating next to nothing all day so I could have chicken strips, fries and a blizzard from Dairy Queen for dinner. And you know what reinforced those super unhealthy habits? Hearing my friends and family tell me “You look great!” (AKA you look smaller.) These comments all come from a place of love and good intention, and I have said them to others too. But having had personal experience with doing unhealthy things to get external results that made me appear healthy, it made me reconsider the way I was praising and congratulating others for their weight loss without any knowledge of what they were doing to themselves to get those results. I am “bigger” now than I was at other points in my life when I thought I was at my optimal health, and know that my nutrition and exercising habits are much healthier for me now than they were back then.

My health is not indicative of my worth. I wish I could give my 2017 self a big hug and a much needed heart to heart with lots of encouragement. In hindsight, I know full well that I did not believe this back then. Healthy or unhealthy, we are all worthy. We all matter, and we all have value to add to this world. What makes me most sad, is that I felt like I had to lose weight to give myself the confidence and courage to be my unapologetic self. I wish I would have known that I had just as much to offer the world then as I do now. I left a lot of life unlived by exhausting so much energy on comparing myself to others, trying to figure out how to lose weight, shaming myself for what I was eating and for looking the way I did… if this is you, listen up. YOU matter. YOU are worthy. You are worthy right now, in this very moment, regardless of what you look like. You were beautifully and wonderfully made and you are capable of anything and everything you want to accomplish, without losing weight first.

My body is not me. This may sound a little out there, but hear me out. This took me a long time to grasp, but it’s a belief that has totally transformed how I view myself. I am Lauren. I am not Lauren’s body. Even when my body feels unhealthy, broken down or weak, that does not mean that I am those things. At the end of the day, my body is the place that my spirit dwells. Have you ever thought of yourself without your body? What does it look like to just be YOU – without all the physical attributes attached? The limited attributes than can be used to describe my body do not even begin to describe me.

My happiness isn’t determined by my health. I didn’t know it at the time, but I blamed my poor health for being the reason why I wasn’t truly happy. “When I weigh ____, I’ll be happy.” “When I lose just five more pounds, I’ll be happy.” “When those jeans fit again, I’ll be happy.” I wasted a lot of time on waiting to be happy, when I could have chosen to be happy right then and there, regardless of the circumstances. Yes, it undoubtedly “feels good” to feel healthy. But I can still feel happy even when I don’t feel healthy. There were plenty of times this past year that made me realize if I’m counting on perfect nutrition and perfect workouts to bring me happiness, then I’m going to be in a world of hurt when life happens and makes those things challenging, or even impossible to accomplish at times. I learned how to be happy even when I didn’t feel my healthiest, feel the best about my body, what I was eating, how I was moving… and though it was a really frustrating time I’m thankful I learned how to find happiness despite those things.

It’s okay if you don’t believe these things, or if you have no desire to. It took hearing these messages over and over and over and at the right time for me to really internalize them, which ultimately changed how I thought about myself and how I lived my life. If you’re ready for a change in this direction, I have a few suggestions on where to start.

Tune out people who make you feel otherwise about any of the above. Have you ever really paid attention to the messaging you ingest on a daily basis? Like really. Through our TVs, the radio, social media, who we spend time with… we are exposed to so many messages that prey on our insecurities and we have more control over this than what we might think. Watch a new show, change the station and unfollow people if any of what’s coming at you makes you feel “less than.” I’m fortunate enough to not have experience with this in regards to relationships, but if you have a parent, a sibling, a partner, a friend, a co-worker, etc. who is making you feel this way, it might be time for a conversation about it. The people I surround myself with make me feel loved and the people I follow on social media share these messages constantly. Knowing that they believe these things helps me to believe them about myself, too. One of my favorite people to follow is Jenna Kutcher. Her body positive messages are what we need to see more of in my opinion.

Start noticing others for who they are, not what they look like. By focusing less on what you see and more on what you feel when you’re with others, the more you’ll be able to do this with yourself. It’s crazy how what we judge in others is often what we judge most about ourselves. When you criticize others less, you will start to criticize yourself less, too. Pay others compliments that are focused on their character. E.g. “I really appreciate the way you support me when I’m having a hard day.”

Focus on your health, not your reflection or the scale. I think many of us have been fed the same BS when it comes to how to get healthy. Eat less calories. Exercise more. Eat low fat. Eat low carb. etc. I didn’t truly know how to get healthy until I took the time to learn about it (and I don’t recommend using Dr. Google for this either). If you truly want to change your health I encourage you to learn about the power of real food and how the nutrients in vegetables, fruits and properly raised animal products can impact your health for the better. By spending more time on educating myself and making changes based upon that information, I have spent less time caring about what my appearance looks like and what number I see on the scale. And oh, the scale. I now weigh myself maybe four times a year. If the number you see determines how you talk to yourself, do yourself a favor and take a break from it. You can still have a “good day” even if you feel two pounds heavier.

Book recommendations:

• Eat the Yolks by Liz Wolfe
  • “Liz Wolfe doesn’t just make a case for eating the whole egg. She uncovers the shocking lies we’ve been told about fat, cholesterol, routine, carbs and calories and brings us the truth about which foods are healthy – and which foods are really harming us.” (Back Cover)
• Practical Paleo by Diane SanFilippo
  • “Practical Paleo provides all the information you need to switch to a Paleo lifestyle and maintain it long-term. A comprehensive review of how food affects our bodies clears up confusion about what’s good and what’s bad. Thirty-day meal plans address a wide variety of concerns, from overcoming illness to losing weight to enhancing athletic performance.” (Front Cover)

Podcast recommendations:

• Balanced Bites
• Well Fed Women
  • Both of these podcasts are for women, by women and shed light on a healthy and balanced approach to nutrition and physical health while keeping in mind the challenges of reality and the importance of mental health, sleep, stress management, hormonal health, etc.

Wishing you so much love and happiness in 2019,

Lauren

 

Here’s another 20-some-year-old woman creating a blog. Not super original these days, I know. But please read on to find out why I created it and what I intend to do with it. And bless you for looking at the length of this post and continuing to read on anyway. I have lots of thoughts I want to share, and compiling them all is so good for my soul. I’ve always loved words and finding ways to piece them together to perfectly articulate what’s rattling around in my head.

Over the past year or so I’ve shared a lot about my journey to becoming a healthier me on social media. This was never something I intended to do initially. I took a risk when I shared my first post and the feedback and following I got from just that post alone was overwhelming. It revealed to me that people were watching me and that I had the opportunity to inspire and empower people who were facing struggles I was all too familiar with: poor body image, feeling controlled by food, failing time after time to make “better choices” that didn’t ever actually change anything I wanted them to, and feeling discouraged to the point of just not trying any more. I’ve been there and I know how much those things hurt. And after years of trying to find something that worked for me, I had found it. Why wouldn’t I share that with other people if it could offer them the same freedom it was offering me?

I loved sharing recipes I was using, parts of my workouts and just showing others that I was committing to myself in this way. It became clear rather quickly that what I was sharing was really making an impact on others. When people told me they had tried my recipes or that my post about working out inspired them to go to the gym, I was so humbled and moved. I was just sharing about my experiences of using a program that felt like a very healthy approach to nutrition and working out and was easy to implement into my busy lifestyle. I decided to become a Beachbody coach so I could share what I had been doing with others. Though I despised all of the common misconceptions about people working that business (that I once had myself), I was determined to do it my way, and do it differently than a lot of people I had seen in my news feed.

People started reaching out to me and asking questions like, what should I be eating to lose weight? Is there a better alternative to butter? How many carbs should I eat in a day? etc. I so desperately wanted to help them and know the answers to what they were asking. I would make an educated guess based on what my own nutrition plan told me, the conflicting information I found on Google along with what I thought I knew about nutrition. But at the end of the day, I had no education to guide my answers and no real foundational knowledge to reference when answering people’s questions, and that just didn’t sit right with me. Yes, I could continue doing what I was doing with my business, make money, and live happily ever after without it. But I wanted the education. I wanted to learn why my program was working for me, why the same thing would or wouldn’t work for another person, and of course, if “I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter” is actually better for you than real butter (by the way, it’s not. But I’ll divulge on that subject in a future post.)

I absolutely loved that by working my Beachbody business I had connected with old friends, and made several new friends all because of my new passion. I even helped some of them make strides in their own journeys to being healthier and took great pride in that. Though I had originally begun the program to lose weight and change my outside, somewhere along the way I found wellness, and how to take care of the inside of me. (And ya know what? I learned that when you focus on taking care of the inside, the outside takes care of itself.) Again, without diving into another post completely here, in short, I discovered how to be very self-aware and make lifestyle decisions that made me feel my best inside and out. I seriously felt like I had been reborn, like I got to start living a new life. I know that might sound melodramatic, but I really can’t describe it any other way. I wanted to give wellness to nearly everyone I knew. So I talked about it, a lot. And I’m deeply sorry if any of my posts or personal messages came across as me just wanting your money because that was never my intention. But getting paid in addition to helping people feel as amazing as I did? That sounded like a dream. And it still does. It was so hard to make the decision that ultimately Beachbody coaching was just not the right platform for me, while not yet knowing how I could potentially make an income from my passion without spending a lot of my own time and money to do so. By closing this door, I felt like I had failed, and that’s not something I’ve experienced much of, or a concept that I was even open to experiencing for most of my life. I’m not kidding (or bragging) when I say that in general, I have succeeded at just about everything that I’ve ever tried or stuck my neck out for. But fear of failure, disappointing myself, and disappointing others kept me from trying a lot of things. If I wasn’t certain I’d be just great at something, I didn’t even give it the time of day. For once I had taken a leap of faith, wasn’t sure if I would fail or fly, and just tried to enjoy every bit of the experience for what it was worth. Better late than never to learn that failure can result in growth. Hitting the ground stung for a bit, but I knew it wasn’t the end of this for me.

God knew I was searching for answers and I happened to stumble upon an Instagram post referencing the Nutritional Therapy Association and their Nutritional Therapy Practitioner certification. I read nearly every word on their website, every answer on their FAQ page, and a couple of hours later, I was convinced this certification was the answer. The NTA believes that food is medicine and that many illnesses, ailments and diseases can be alleviated, reversed and ultimately cured by changing one’s food, supplementation and lifestyle. Yes. yes, and yes. I believe all those things too (though there was a time I would have had NO idea what any of that meant. It’s okay if you don’t, but trust me, it’s fascinating.) It was only in hindsight that I could really understand my own health struggles and that eating REAL food was ultimately the main factor that helped me feel like a completely different person from the inside out. This certification will give me the knowledge, understanding and tools I need to truly help those around me, with a completely individualized approach. Will it take me longer? Yep. Will it be hard to accomplish while working a full-time job and fulfilling all of my other obligations? Absolutely. But it will be worth every sacrifice to be able to help others find what makes them optimally well and healthy. It’s scary to say (type) these intentions out loud because it makes them real. But I want to be transparent about where I’ve been, where I’m at, and where I’m headed. To be honest, all the kinks haven’t been worked out with my plan, but I’m trusting that it’s all unfolding like this for a reason. With any luck, I will enroll in the program before the end of 2018.

<<EDIT: Nearly three months later, I still haven’t published this post and made my blog public. For whatever reason, I just didn’t feel ready. And I’m glad I didn’t. As the year has continued to unfold, I’ve had a lot of realizations. The first being that I think I was so eager to jump into earning money through this passion because deep down I was unknowingly trying to find a reason to jump ship on my current profession. Being a preschool teacher is insanely emotionally draining work, especially when working with a population affected by trauma. It doesn’t come with a ton of respect as a profession from our society as a whole, it doesn’t come with wearing cute heels and business attire to work, and nothing about wiping butts roughly 17 times a day screams “professional” to the average person. I think some insecurities about my chosen career have bubbled to the surface over time, and along with the challenges I face daily, quite frankly I was ready to say, “to hell with it.” I think that’s why I felt so strongly about pursuing a “side hustle” that could potentially become a full-time hustle. And while I still want to pursue this program, I’m starting to get comfortable with the fact that God is still using me in the field of early childhood education, and that completing this program may not happen as quickly as I can snap my fingers. (Which is real quick, if you ask my mom.) But once again, my prayers were answered and within the past couple of weeks I learned of the opportunity to take a shorter class that would cost a fraction of the other certification by two of my most favorite mentors in holistic nutrition, Diane Sanfilippo and Liz Wolfe called the Balanced Bites Master Class. I’m officially signed up and can NOT wait to start on July 9th! This will be the perfect way for me to “get my toes wet” and also give myself some credibility before I keep posting pictures of “healthy” recipes without being able to fully defend why they’re healthy. However, I’m not going to financially benefit from any of this any time soon, and I actually think that’s for the best. This way, nothing about my work can be misinterpreted because I’m doing this “fo free.” I’ve got so much to share and I feel called to share it, credentials or not. I can share a lot of work from peeps who do have the credentials, and that feels like it’s enough for me right now.>>

So, about the blog. I felt like it was finally time to create my own space where I can keep “all the things” together, and where I can dive deeper into topics I can go on and on about (like debunking nutrition and workout myths). You’ll find all of that here. I’ll post links to new blog posts on my other social media platforms, but if you know you’re going to want to read them (I’ll make them worth your while, I promise!) you can go ahead and follow me to get notifications each time I write a new post. (Click the + at the bottom of the post and click the link to do so!) I plan to share recipes, my thoughts on different wellness topics or concepts, book recommendations and more. Most importantly, I will never claim to have all of the answers. But as I continue to learn, my passion about this subject continues to evolve and it is such a joy to share it with all of you. If you’re still reading this blog post, have liked or commented on any of my past posts, have tried my recipes, or said kind words regarding my lifestyle, thank you. It seriously means so much to me to have your love and support, and hopefully your attention. Because if I have your attention, that means I have the opportunity to share something with you that just might change your life like it did mine.

A good friend recently shared this quote with me and it encompasses all that I’m aspiring to do with my lifestyle and this blog.

“In a world full of ‘look at me’ girls, be a ‘come with me’ girl.”

I’m looking forward to all that lies ahead, and I invite you to come with me.

Lauren